Why Women Still Second-Guess Themselves (And How Strengths-Based Leadership Can Build Confidence)
By Jo Self, Founder of Practical StrengthsWhy do so many capable women still second-guess themselves?
Even when the data shows they’re exactly what modern leadership needs, so many women still hesitate. Still doubt. Still feel they have something to prove.
Luckily for us, women naturally embody the qualities of great leadership. That may sound bold - but the evidence is there.
Take The Athena Doctrine: How Women (and the Men Who Think Like Them) Will Rule the Future by John Gerzema and Michael D’Antonio - a global study involving 64,000 people across 13 countries. Their research revealed that two-thirds of participants believed the world would be a better place if men thought more like women.
They found that traits often labelled as ‘feminine’ - like nurturing, cooperation, communication, and empathy - are exactly what people now associate with the essence of modern leadership.
The result? The very qualities women often downplay are the ones the world is waiting for.
Now, isn’t that an exciting thought?
The Cost of Self-Doubt
The pressure to meet both external expectations and internal standards is relentless. Even women who sit at the top still feel it.
Michelle Obama once shared:
“I still have a little impostor syndrome… It doesn’t go away, that feeling that you shouldn’t take me that seriously. What do I know? I share that with you because we all have doubts about what that power is.”
Self-doubt doesn’t discriminate. But what if we had a practical way to interrupt it?
Why Strengths Language Works
While self-awareness is helpful, real change happens through self-appreciation. That’s where CliftonStrengths comes in.
By identifying your top 34 natural talents, you can see yourself objectively - not as a collection of lucky breaks, but as someone with repeatable, reliable sources of energy and influence.
It’s a way to name your power and back it up with evidence.
Reframing ‘Soft’ Skills as Strategic Advantages
Let’s take Empathy as our example here:
In the language of CliftonStrengths, Empathy is about tuning in. It’s reading the room, calming conflict, defusing tension, asking the right question at the right time.
While so often dismissed as ‘soft’, empathy is strategy.
The same goes for Harmony, Adaptability, Developer, Relator. These aren’t ‘nice-to-haves’ - they’re the bedrock of emotionally intelligent, sustainable leadership.
Strengths-based language rewrites the story: These aren’t soft skills. They’re success skills.
Lead From Alignment, Not Approval
Strengths-based leadership invites women to step away from outdated models and lead from their authentic centre.
When you know your Strengths, you don’t need permission. You don’t need to mimic. You don’t need to perform.
You can move from seeking approval to seeking alignment. From “Am I allowed to do this?” to “This is how I do this.”
When you can confidently say, “I lead with Relator-style connection and Command-level presence,” it quiets self-doubt and affirms your value - even in rooms where you once questioned whether you belonged.
Practical Tools
How to Take the CliftonStrengths Assessment:
Purchase and complete the 34-theme assessment (approx. 30–40 min).
Receive your personalised report ranking your Strengths, with detailed insights into how they show up in your thinking, actions, and relationships.
Journal Prompt: Discover Your Strengths in Action
List your Top 5 CliftonStrengths from your report. For each one:
When did I last use this Strength deliberately?
What energy did it give me?
How did it influence the outcome?
Reflection: How could naming and using this Strength help you prepare for your next big challenge - whether that’s a meeting, negotiation, or stepping into a new role?
From “Who Am I to Do This?” to “How Can I Do This?”
This shift changes everything.
Does it erase impostor syndrome overnight? Of course not. But it gives women a practical way to ground themselves in what’s true.
Instead of sitting in “Who am I to do this?” you can move to “How can I do this - using what I know I bring?”
It’s a more honest, empowering question. It’s a lens you can carry into the moments that matter…
When preparing for a high-stakes meeting. When negotiating your worth. When deciding to lead in a way that’s fully yours.
In a world that’s hungry for new leadership, perhaps the boldest move is not to reinvent yourself - but to lead with what’s already true.
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