A Midlife Rebel’s December Reflection
By Josie Hamilton-Cook, Visionary Creator of Rebellious Essence & Director of Transformational Luxury RetreatsDecember has arrived with its familiar frenzy, lists, logistics, sparkle, and sales. The world tells us to sprint harder, wrap tighter, sparkle brighter. Yet beneath the twinkly lights, many of us feel less like celebrating and more like surviving.
Because women don’t just show up at Christmas, we create it. We hold the emotional tone, the meals, the memories, the magic. No wonder the festive season feels more like endurance than enjoyment. Especially in midlife, when we’re already carrying elderly parents, empty nests, careers, and the waves of menopause. December magnifies it all. And while we’re busy holding everything together, our bodies whisper (or shout) the truth that we are all doing too much.
The Cost of Doing Too Much
We’ve been conditioned to believe our worth is measured by how much we can hold, the endless lists, the perfectly wrapped gifts, the meals, the memories, the emotional labour. And while we’re busy holding everything together, we quietly unravel inside.
I know this story well. For much of my married life, I was a recovering people-pleaser and perfectionist. At Christmas, I was like Nigella on speed (?!) each year trying to outdo myself and win my in-laws approval (that never came). I even hosted Christmas for the whole family three days after giving birth, absolute madness, looking back. Several burnouts later, I’m glad to say I’m a reformed character.
Now, as a single woman of fifty-four with a grown daughter, the pressure is off. Yet Christmas still triggers me. The glossy media images of perfect partners, perfect tables, perfect cocktails, all designed to make us feel “less than.” To compete, we do more, spend more, and try harder. But at what cost?
It is only one day after all, and yet it causes so much stress. No wonder we feel the anticlimax on Boxing Day or get the January blues, was it all worth it? And at the very time of year when nature calls us inward, we are busier than ever, pushing ourselves into the commercial rush. I still love the twinkly lights and decorations, mostly to survive the British winter darkness, but I use them to create what the Danes call hygge: cosy contentment. Comfort through warming foods, blankets, fires, and candlelight.
A Year of Shedding
This December feels more intense than most. I’ve spoken to countless women who feel drained, suffocated, disconnected. 2025 has been a year of shedding: relationships breaking down, careers shifting, identities dissolving. Nothing feels quite right. It’s as if we’re suspended in the void between who we once were and who we are becoming.
Energetically, 2025 has been a year of endings, the year of the Snake and a 9 year in numerology, which is about completing old cycles. Anything that has left your life was never meant to come forward into 2026. And with 2026, which is a 1 year in numerology, we are closing cycles and stepping into new beginnings.
Have you felt it? That restless ache. That quiet burn of more. That knowing the old ways no longer fit, and the new you is waiting to rise.
My Own Rebellion
I know this ache intimately. After leaving a twenty-six-year marriage, I found myself living solo for the first time at 54. Terrifying, liberating, clarifying. I realised transformation isn’t just about surviving, it’s about choosing to thrive.
Through my own transformation, Rebellious Essence was born. My values of Freedom, Abundance, and Transformation underpin my new business. I help women rise from the dark goop into their technicolour goddess era. My philosophy is radical yet simple: you must do both the internal and external work to transform truly. Otherwise, it’s like reading the book and never reaching the end.
It starts with how you show up how you dress, speak, move through the world. Once you align with your truth, the relationships and opportunities that match your frequency arrive. No more pretending, just showing up as all of you.
Menopause as a Beacon
I truly believe that my purpose is to help women in midlife step into their second chapter in style.
And here lies the paradox: midlife is both a crisis and an awakening, a time of endings and beginnings. The tension between decline and expansion makes this stage one of the most powerful for transformation.
Menopause doesn’t have to be about suffering or the end. Here’s the controversial truth: menopause isn’t just a medical condition. It’s a message.
The hot flushes, sleepless nights, anxiety, exhaustion, they’re not random. They’re the body’s way of saying: enough. Enough rushing, enough shrinking, enough living for everyone else.
Menopause is the revolution. It’s the technicolour era, where we refuse invisibility and rise in unapologetic truth. And yet, the world tells us to sprint harder, finish stronger, keep producing. No wonder we’re stressed. No wonder we feel like strangers to ourselves.
A Different Rhythm
So, here’s my invitation: let’s stop sprinting to the finish line of the year. Let’s stop sacrificing ourselves on the altar of perfection. Instead, let’s soften into the season.
Imagine December not as a marathon, but as a sanctuary. A time to rest, root, and gather. A time to light candles, not floodlights. To choose soul over sales.
What if you could start 2026 with a clean slate? No more asking permission. No more shrinking. Just a time to invest in YOU.
Planting Seeds
As we step into the new year, I’m creating spaces for women to gather, rest, and root, whether in Morocco or elsewhere. Immersions where we reclaim freedom, abundance, and transformation. Where we plant seeds of intention and rise with rebellious clarity.
It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about remembering yourself.
The Radical Gift
So as the world spirals into sales and sparkle, I invite you to pause. To reflect. To ask yourself:
What do I truly need this season?
Where am I over-giving, over-doing, over-stretching?
How can I soften into my own rhythm?
Because investing in your inner world is the most radical gift you can give yourself.
And when the calendar turns to 2026, let’s raise a glass to the sisterhood and rise together, in midlife, in technicolour.
