The Path Isn’t Linear: Redefining Success When You Step Away from the 9–5
By Shannon Kate Murray, Editor of High Flying DesignThe path isn’t always linear. And when women step off it, the world doesn’t always know what to do with us.
A friend of mine - a PA in finance by day and a makeup artist on the side - decided to take a month off work between contracts. No scrambling for interviews. No “next role” lined up. Just space. Rest. A reset.
The reactions came quickly: “So what’s the plan?” “Wait… you’re just not working?”
Freedom, it turns out, makes people uncomfortable - especially when it disrupts the script.
The Script We’re Given
Get the good job. Marry the partner. Buy the house. Work hard. Be sensible. Stay safe.
Many of us follow the path. We do what we’re told will lead to fulfilment - and yet so many feel stuck. You hear it everywhere now, especially in quiet corners of the internet: women whispering that the job they worked so hard for is draining them. That the dream they chased is feeling more like a deadline. That they're building lives they no longer want to live in.
It’s not just burnout. It’s a kind of emotional claustrophobia - the slow realisation that ticking the boxes hasn’t led to the freedom we were promised.
Why It Feels Riskier for Women
When a man leaves a corporate job to freelance or launch something new, he’s often called bold. Visionary. Entrepreneurial.
When a woman does the same? People ask if she’s sure. They wonder when she’ll go back. They assume something went wrong.
That’s not just perception - it’s systemic. The Alison Rose Review of Female Entrepreneurship (2023) found women are 55% more likely than men to cite fear of failure as a barrier to starting a business. We’re encouraged to be reliable. Modest. Risk-averse. To trade freedom for security - even when the security is suffocating.
And when you step away from the script, people notice - not always kindly. If you’ve experienced this, remember: people tend to react to change through the lens of their own fears. When you choose pause, freedom, or uncertainty, it can unearth something in them - a quiet wondering, maybe, of what they’ve denied themselves.
The Quiet Unlearning
To give High Flying Design my full-time attention, I left a stable, well-paying director-level role in marketing and operations. It was a job people work years to land. On paper, it made sense to stay.
But something in me was ready for a new chapter. What I didn’t expect was how much I need to unlearn.
Like many women I know, I felt I needed a “bridge job” - freelance work to make it look like I hadn’t really left. Something to prove I was still productive. Still responsible.
Because deep down, I believed this:
If it doesn’t look like a job, it doesn’t count.
But the truth? I’d already built something that mattered. A magazine. A platform. A space for women growing bold, beautiful businesses in their own way.
What I hadn’t built yet was the trust in myself to let that be enough.
Therapists call this transition identity detachment - a grief process, of sorts. You’re letting go of the version of you who was rewarded for being endlessly reliable, endlessly available. It’s not a breakdown. It’s a recalibration.
What if Success Looks Different?
Success doesn’t always look like a title or a paycheck. Sometimes, it looks like peace.
It looks like:
Purpose instead of pressure
Rest instead of reactivity
A slow build instead of a sprint
You hear it in women’s stories everywhere once you start listening: from those who don’t hate work but hate how worn down it makes them feel, to those who fear they'll never leave. These aren’t rare stories. They’re everywhere. They’re what happens when smart, capable women realise they want something more - and decide not to wait for something to change on its own.
If You’re in the In-Between
You don’t need a new title to be doing something real. You don’t need full-time income to deserve space. You don’t need to explain your pause.
That pause? It’s not an accident. It’s not a gap. It’s a gateway.
If your dreams look quieter, softer, or freer than what you were taught to want, you’re not behind. You’re just beginning something different.
Most people won’t understand your vision until it’s working. So please don’t wait for their permission to start.
Go ahead:
Take the pause.
Launch the project.
Publish the piece.
Build the thing.
The path less linear isn’t less valid. It’s the one written in your own handwriting - and that’s a truer success than any title or paycheck.
Maybe that’s exactly what you’re here to claim.
And if you are, I couldn’t be more excited for you.
Have you ever stepped away from the script? Share your story in the comments - your words might be exactly what another woman needs to hear today.
